A recent letter to advice columnist Dear Abby has sparked renewed discussion about the standard practice of tipping in restaurants and other service industries. The writer, identifying as “Tipped Out in Idaho,” expressed frustration over the widespread expectation to tip, particularly the customary 20%, in light of rising living costs and recent experiences.
Changing Attitudes Towards Tipping
The letter highlights a growing sentiment among consumers who feel pressured to tip despite personal financial constraints. The writer recounted a recent incident at a drive-through cookie store where the clerk inquired about leaving a tip before the transaction was even completed. This, alongside anecdotes of service staff following customers to discuss tips, has led to a feeling of discomfort among patrons.
“In this economy, I don’t feel the 20% rule should apply,” the writer asserted, pointing out that the cost of dining out has dramatically increased. They noted that a tip can often equal the price of a small entree, making the expectation to tip feel unreasonable.
Furthermore, the letter reveals a troubling trend where some service workers are assuming that tips are mandatory, regardless of the nature of the service provided. For instance, the writer mentioned feeling guilted by a staff member’s disappointed look when choosing not to tip at a drive-through, leading to further questions about the appropriateness of tipping in such settings.
Dear Abby Offers Perspective
In her response, Abigail Van Buren, who writes under the pen name Jeanne Phillips, acknowledged the complexities of the tipping culture. She emphasized that many service employees rely on tips to supplement low wages. Nonetheless, she condemned the practice of soliciting tips directly and expressed concern over the behavior of the server who confronted the writer’s niece about a small tip.
“A tip should never be requested, and for a server to follow your niece out of a restaurant to discuss a small tip is beyond the pale,” she stated. Van Buren advised readers to leave a tip if they are satisfied with the service rather than feeling obligated to adhere to a rigid percentage.
The conversation around tipping is not limited to restaurants; it extends to various services, leading to a reevaluation of the expectations placed on consumers. Many are questioning the appropriateness of tipping in places where the service is more transactional, such as drive-throughs and quick-service establishments.
As this dialogue continues, it raises important questions about fair compensation for service workers and the evolving standards of customer service. The tipping culture is undoubtedly a topic that will remain relevant as economic conditions fluctuate and consumer habits change.
For more insights and advice on social norms and etiquette, readers can visit Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com.
